sabato, dicembre 30, 2006

AIN'T I A WOMAN?

by Sojourner Truth

Delivered 1851 at the Women's Convention in Akron, Ohio

Well, children, where there is so much racket there must be something out of kilter. I think that 'twixt the negroes of the South and the women at the North, all talking about rights, the white men will be in a fix pretty soon. But what's all this here talking about?

That man over there says that women need to be helped into carriages, and lifted over ditches, and to have the best place everywhere. Nobody ever helps me into carriages, or over mud-puddles, or gives me any best place! And ain't I a woman? Look at me! Look at my arm! I have ploughed and planted, and gathered into barns, and no man could head me! And ain't I a woman? I could work as much and eat as much as a man - when I could get it - and bear the lash as well! And ain't I a woman? I have borne thirteen children, and seen most all sold off to slavery, and when I cried out with my mother's grief, none but Jesus heard me! And ain't I a woman?

Then they talk about this thing in the head; what's this they call it? [member of audience whispers, "intellect"] That's it, honey. What's that got to do with women's rights or negroes' rights? If my cup won't hold but a pint, and yours holds a quart, wouldn't you be mean not to let me have my little half measure full?

Then that little man in black there, he says women can't have as much rights as men, 'cause Christ wasn't a woman! Where did your Christ come from? Where did your Christ come from? From God and a woman! Man had nothing to do with Him.

If the first woman God ever made was strong enough to turn the world upside down all alone, these women together ought to be able to turn it back , and get it right side up again! And now they is asking to do it, the men better let them.

Obliged to you for hearing me, and now old Sojourner ain't got nothing more to say.

(I have always found a lot of anwers in this here speach, for many of my despairs. And I have often found that we are still a long way from home)

venerdì, dicembre 22, 2006

Quando estive apaixonada

A ultima vez que tive coragem de abrir o coracao para o romance (quase sem medo nem hesitacao) fui capaz de escrever o que abaixo se segue:

13 de Setembro 2006

Estava aqui a consumir-me na minha nova obsessao...dedico-me a fazer downloads de series e filmes que sempre quis ver e a ver ate altas horas da noite...Ocasionalmente tenho pensamentos doces e carinhosos da tua pessoa, quando vejo algo ou oico algo que mesmo remotamente me lembre de ti...

Estava a ver House MD (que e uma satira brilhante sobre cobardia, hipocrisia e falta de moralidade, alem de outros vicios do relacionamento humano e uma serie brilhante sobre medicina inutil).

Por razoes que ja nao me vem a memoria estava a jurarque tinha que me ir deitar porque amanha (que ja e hoje) tenho que acordar as 6:30, o que e um perfeito tormento para mim. E estava a pensar que te tinha quemandar uma mensagem a expressar os meus pensamentos doces e carinhosos sobre a tua pessoa... porque os sinto, e porque acho que neste momento te farao particularmente bem. E a medida que o episodio foi acabando comecei a ouvir algo porque me apaixonei imediatamente... sabes como eo meu coracao, um fraco e romantico pedaco de musculoincapaz de resistir a paixoes avassaladoras...

Fiquei a perguntar-me de quem seria, e em que album estaria... e se gostarias... Possivelmente nao te apaixonara tanto quanto a mim.muito provavelmente nem te fara tremer o chao. Ja sei, cabeca antes do coracao... mas escuta, quem sabe gostas... pelo menos um pouco.

None of us are free de Solomon Burke

Quando tenho momentos como este (agora, sentada ao meu computador, ouvindo este blues lindo e escrevendo para ti) penso que a vida pode ser perfeita... Faz-me acreditar talvez nao na humanidade, mas em algumas pessoas. Faz-me abrir o coracao e ver tudo com novas e lindas cores (flores, no original)... incrivel o poderde um simples blues (pergunto-me que musica me fara ver coracoes).

tua catorzinha apaixonada...

(depois de me terem esmagado estas flores de felicidade, penso que levarei algum tempo a ver coracoes em musicas - nem acredito que depois de tanto tempo ainda mexa assim comigo. Incrivel como coisas pequenas perturbam de forma intensa.)

martedì, dicembre 19, 2006

The best norwegian music channel

Estou a comer uvas


(photo taken from www.istockphoto.com)


Estou a pensar em ti


Day Dreaming - Paul Gauguin


Faz-me falta a tua voz

Whisper - Monica Stewart

Esta a custar-me cada vez mais resistir-te


E uma injustica ter que escolher entre o que queremos e o que merecemos

domenica, dicembre 17, 2006

My ass

Do I have ass tatooed on my forehead?


Does it say 'I can take anything, so give it to me'?


If it does, then kiss it!



The hint (from sporter.web-log.nl/sporter/algemeen/index.html)


You know you'll love it

Sick

I am sick... i should be committed into a mental institution...

How can I be drawn to these absolutely distructive situations... move towards the fire...

Ohhhhhhh! I am a moth...

:P

venerdì, dicembre 15, 2006

Botswana

As mulheres do Botswana estao a descobrir que ter homem em casa e uma nuisance... bem, algumas mulheres da Zambezia e Nampula ja tinham chegado a mesma conclusao... Homens sao optimos para efeitos de reproducao... passada essa funcao, sao intragaveis...

Sao optimos sedutores, convencem-nos do que pensamos que precisamos, mas assim que baixamos as defesas... la vem a imagem verdadeira... e ja pensam que sao donos do castelo.

Dentro de toda essa treta de companheirismo, almas gemeas ou menos gemeas, entendimento, etc. quero so mais uma coisinha: alguem que nao fique com uma vontade irresistivel de ser meu dono, so porque lhe sorrio, dou-lhe atencao ou quando partilhamos alguns fluidos...

Custa muito continuar aquele ser encantador que nos fascinou? Para que tirar a mascara... a mascara e linda...

E ainda se admiram porque temos tantas dores de cabeca...

giovedì, dicembre 14, 2006

Which witch?


I keep confronting myself with the kind of witch I wish to be. A gentle fairy soul or a coarse cynic hex.


Who does it really benefit... and do I really want to fit.


Is it all really as it seems.


I rather continue to be the bad girl, the ugly foe... One better show the worst side, so when the true beuty comes about it is dazzling beyond reproach.


Plus fairies are sissies!!!!!!!!!!

Culpa e Heresia

Tenho medo de ser feliz... e um facto... nao tanto que nao goste... adoro ser feliz, mas quando estou excessivamente feliz comeco a pensar que algo tera que correr mal, porque ser feliz assim so pode ser pecado.

E comeco logo a rever as razoes de tanta felicidade, e percebo que me sinto especial e unica; que quero ter melhor e mais que o resto dos mortais; que nao aceito que me pisem e retalio quando necessario; que programo a minha vida para um futuro soberbo; que perco o meu tempo a sonhar com o mundo e a sua beleza e menos tempo com stress que ele me provoca no dia a dia; que como sem medida e preocupacao; que me presenteio com adornos e indulgencias que me impulsionem o bem estar... enfim, penso em mim e sou o centro do mundo... do meu mundo... e descubro que vivo em plena harmonia com os 7 pecados capitais: soberba, ineja, ira, avareza, preguica, gula e luxuria.

Sou entao inundada de pensamentos obscuros... sobre a minha forma de pesar e estar, sobre as minhas liberdades e libertinagens... e pergunto-me se os prazeres momentaneos que me proporciono nao serao o impulso da vida de miseria e desespero na qual depois caio?!

Mas Sidhartha ja dizia que no ascetismo nao encontrou resposta... e definitivamente a liberdade absoluta nem tempo da para pensar... e se o caminho do mio e tao obscuro e ilusivo? Que nos (me) resta?

Demasiado judaico-crista para o meu gosto.

Fear factor

I've been meaning to talk about this for a long time, now... And now I have just even more reasons...

I just don't know what comes over me... what comes over people... why would they (we) risk our lives for minutes of pleasure... in the eventual promise of eternity.

And then why would they (we) be consumed with doubt and fear?

What is this reality we are living in that makes us affraid of our own shadow?

Were did the trust go? And why is it all about proof and deceit?

What reality if scoring can get you killed... a long and agonizing death.

Fuck!

mercoledì, dicembre 13, 2006

Wansati (women)

So, I guess I am a woman. Well (wrong!!!!!!!!!!!!) i am a female.

We are born females and become women.

As a child I ran faster than boys, climbed higher on trees too... Actually I was quite a legend for this (but it could have been that the guys just wanted to stare at my knickers...). Either way, boobs and bum have slowed me down quite a bit... and that is what they are after now.

But this is not immediate... because you can have the female boons and bums and still not become a woman... and if you do, you may be quite far away from even being feminine.

So womanhood is a state of mind. It's a cause. It is embrassing who you are and accepting yourself... whether you feel trapped or freed.

Being a woman is knowing how others perceive you and acknowledging the rules that come with it...

Being feminine, well... that can be a lot of things, depending of who is looking at it... It can be survival, it can be laying down arms, it can be picking them up and using them fair, square and wisely... You choose. I am a fighter, guess what I think I do.

Men often say to each other: you're a man! (Like that is something to be prout of). Well, we don't say it enough... YOU ARE A WOMAN!

Godamnit woman, you're a woman... for that, woman, you are a survivor, a fighter, a leader, a teacher, a teaser, and above all an inspiration...

This black is beautifull thing... WOMAN IS GORGEOUS!

The more I am aware of myself (my womanhood) the more I am in love with being a woman. The more I love myself. The more I find myself being beautifull...

And I ask myself why is is that us (I included) do so many things to hurt ourselves, undermine our greatness...

We are affraid to loose
We are affraid of ending up alone
We believe we are worth less (specially if we are alone)
We were taught do not to believe in ourselves and our capabilities
We are affraid not to experience motherhood (the sole reason, we are told, we were put on earth)
We love a lot, but not ourselves
We are missusing our power of seduction
We were taught to hate other women (or at least view them as competitors)
We are taught that somehow it is always our fault
We accept what we are taught and embrace and live with our fears
We are ashamed of speaking our mind for the fear of being called feminists
You name it... the list is endless, but the bottom line is that we were taught and we are affraid!


Dull Men's Club

Don't take me wrong, I don't hate men (I love them, too much, in fact), and I don't mean men are less... I just mean we are special.

What do I really want?

I am astonished... I cannot recognise my wishes anymore... As I rationalise it and contrast it to what I idealised, I might have found what I have been searching for. But my heart is numb, so I take it that my instincts are stopping me. And then it could be that I am again waiting for Godot... that my insatiable and unpleaseable being is taking over me...

Or it could just be that I am peaking at happiness, and it is overwhelming in it's magnitude, and either I feel I don't deserve it or that I can't handle it.

Life has pierced my fearless soul... it has wounded it beyond repair... faith just falls in and spills out... when reality hits I cannot feel, I cannot react, I do not know myself anymore.

Well... good for you... congratulations: you've become and adult (and survived). All you have to do now is look forward to becoming old. How fancy.

Some days I just hate life and the fact that I was born with too much love to give.

But what I am the most affraid off is that one day I will wake up and will not hate anymore... I will just cope.

Adulthood

If there is a phrase I hate (and actually I hate a great many) it is the phrase: we are adults. Being adults has began to mean cynicism over life... Adults are suposed to be without feelings and emotions, unable to express frustration and pain... otherwise they will just be called imature and childish.

I WANT TO BE A CHILD, not just be in touch with my inner child... but be a child... be able to be myself and allowed to express my feelings without containment as they come.

Rationality is bullshit... and you even wonder why kids kill their colleagues and themselves... the perspective of growing isn't all that bright... all they have to look for is to become ADULTS :P



This sucks (taken from damaged.anime.net/updates.htm)




martedì, dicembre 12, 2006

Time

Guito/Taco/Mola/Kumbu

Maka/Milando

(Dissecando conceitonimos)

Once in

So sue me... I am a bad person... I am a woman, so that is redundant... I have said it once, will say it a thousand times. Somehow it is always our fault.

So sue me... I know better, and I still go and do the dumb thing... It is not even emotional because I am perfectly able to rationalise it.

So sue me... I have gone to hell and don't manage (or am unwilling) to drag myself back.

So sue me...

But for crying out loud stop pitying me. Stop judging me. Because you are no better and you don't know what you'd do in my shoes... because there is no morality, only hypocrisy in this world... because it is so, 'cause I said so...

So sue me... if you dear... Coward!

domenica, dicembre 10, 2006

Salva vidas

Nunca se descurem... quando entram num navio, vejam sempre onde estao os salva-vidas... mas se nao conseguirem embarcar em nenhum, nem imaginam tudo o que nos pode salvar a vida...